Unsent Texts to My Father After the Election

Received 11/9/16 6am from Dad: “Donald Trump was a populist candidate who gets it regarding what the original intention of the constitution was… ‘for the people and by the people'”

11/9/16 6:01am. “Not feeling too good about the men in my family who unapologetically support a person who talks about and treats women the way Trump does (not to mention his racism, ableism, Islamophobia, and xenophobia).  I’m wondering how you can justify it to yourself.”

11/9/16 6:30am. “I feel personally sold out by my whole country, but it hurts the most that my own father won’t say, ‘It’s wrong to treat women that way.  I have a daughter and I want the world to be a safe place for her.  I won’t stand for it.’  Why won’t you just say it, Dad?”

11/9/16 8:44am. “This world is not safe for me and has been made even less safe because (slightly less than half) my country said, ‘It’s fine what men do to women. So long as he promises to make me some money.’”

11/9/16  11:13am. “Dad, I was so upset this morning I took an early lunch and watched an episode of In the Middle while crying in my car. It was the episode where the father told his 7th grade daughter that he wasn’t ready for her to go to boy/girl parties. He wanted to protect her for longer. Why did you never try to protect me?”

11/9/16 1:34pm. “Why didn’t you warn me what men were like? Why did you send me out in the world undefended?”

11/9/16 1:37pm. “Really, I want to know. Why didn’t you tell me I deserved better than to be preyed upon?”

11/9/16 5:03 pm.“Why don’t you stand up to men, try to make men better, for my sake? Why do you still not want the world to be safe for me? Why don’t you HEAR me? When I say that men like Trump make this world unsafe for women like me, why don’t you HEAR me?”

11/9/16 5:38 pm. “Or is it that you do hear me, but you don’t care?”

11/9/16 6:00 pm.“It’s occurred to me tonight that whenever I feel ashamed for speaking up for myself or standing up for myself, it’s because I think of you, and what you would think.”

11/9/16 8:14pm. “Hard to believe that at this time last night I still had hope that people were essentially good. All these months, every time you expressed your support for that man, I heard it as, ‘It doesn’t matter to me that there’s a rape culture, and that you were victimized by it.  I’d rather be lead by a sexual predator than listen to a woman in power.  Your safety isn’t as important to me as my entitlement to economic advantage over others.’”

11/9/16 9:30pm. “Your vote says to me,  ‘Being supported in my unconscious racist attitudes is so satisfying to me that I chose that over you.’”

11/9/16 11:43pm.“You wouldn’t know this, because I’ve never told you.  But that night, after it happened,  I went to your house. I sought comfort from you, I sought safety.  I needed love.  But when I got there,  I couldn’t even speak. I was too ashamed. I blamed myself.   I never told you, or anyone else.  For years, I never told.   Today, I understand why.”

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Author: yoonede

fiction writer, blogger, recovering person, aspiring adult. follow me on twitter: twitter.com/feralchildguide

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